Written by Vaclav Koranda

3 Things You Should Never Say to HR

Maybe you’ve heard that HR is not your friend. That’s a popular line—and like most popular lines, it’s only half true.

HR wears multiple hats. They are there to attract and develop talent. But they are also there to protect the company from unruly employees. And the company, in the end, is not some abstract concept. It is in fact what the word literally means: a group of people associated together. You can imagine it more like a beehive than a battlefield.

Still, there are certain things you should absolutely not say to HR. Not because they will immediately note everything down, put it on your file, and use it against you when the time comes, but because you are quietly damaging your own position.

Let me give you three top examples:

1. “My work is too hard. I’m burned out.”

This one sounds harmless and in fact, it seems logical to seek help from the department that is supposed to look after people, right? But here is the uncomfortable reality: HR is not your therapist.

When you go to HR and say you are overwhelmed or burned out, what they hear instead is:

 “This person is not able to handle their job.”

And without saying anything—since they are supposed to help people—they will try to relieve you of the burden as soon as the opportunity arises, though not in the way you might expect. They will ensure you are out before you can claim psychiatric injury or constructive dismissal.

2. “I deserve special treatment!”

“I should get an exception.”
“My manager promised…”
“Can’t you just approve this for me?”
“Others got it, why not me?”

Let me translate it to the HR language: “This employee wants us to break our own rules.” And that is a problem.

Policies exist for a reason. The moment HR bends them for one person, they create inconsistency. Inconsistency leads to internal inequity and may even set a precedent. In the end, your small request will lead to bigger headaches than you ever thought.

And even if HR grants you an exception (or is forced to do so), they won’t think, “What a great guy.” They will think, “What a prick. This will come back to bite all of us.”

And they will remember you as the person who created extra workload and risk.

3. “But HR never told me!”

Let me be direct: you are not a child, and HR is not your babysitter.

Your employment contract, the employee handbook, company policies—these are not decorative documents. They define how the game is played, and you should know them.

Saying “HR never told me” is essentially admitting you didn’t bother to read. This signals ignorance and a lack of ownership.

The world moves fast, and those who thrive are the employees who take responsibility for understanding the system they operate in. Don’t use HR as an excuse for your laziness and complacency. 

Conclusion

HR is neither your enemy nor your best friend. They are a specific function in the company. If you approach them emotionally or try to play them, you may make your life more complicated. Instead, try to approach them with clarity, responsibility, and a bit of common sense, and things will work out much better for you.

Good luck!

You May Also Like:

Do you want to get new posts directly to your mailbox? Subscribe here.

Do you need my personal assistance? Simply send me your resume and a link to your LinkedIn profile at vaclav@getyourdreamjob.co and I will come back to you!

Leave a comment